I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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