He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
