We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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