no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
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