this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
