Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
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