I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
