I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize