You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
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