Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
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