Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
4 words: hood of his car
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
