nut hugger
i jhust puked up my retainher.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
