my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
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