I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Randomize
