I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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