you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
