I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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