am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Randomize