problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Randomize
