Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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