Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Randomize
