Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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