I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
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