But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
Randomize
