you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Randomize