i was rollin on her like bob the builder
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
What a dumb baby whore.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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