I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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