im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
your like the ambassador to my penis.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
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