I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
