you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Randomize
