so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Randomize
