Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
