This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
