..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
I am midnight drunk by noon
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
You ate ashes out of my bong
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
