My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize
