"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
