You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
