I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
