My brain says no but my pants say off.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
