all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
should my penis look like a turkey
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Randomize
