can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Randomize
