dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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