Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Randomize
