Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
