I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Randomize
