She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
My feet surprised me
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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