I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I just want to make out with him forever
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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