I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
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