AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize
