In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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